First of a seriesTHIS will be my last column. So let me start with a few reflections on my life.I've written on this before ('Don't let the old man in,' Inquirer, Nov. 7, 2022). Let me take it a bit further and personalize it.As you enter old age, birthdays assume more importance. Apart from the joy of celebrating with family and friends, it reminds you you're still alive. When there are but a few years left of your thinking on life, your life changes.Let me be clear: I'm not talking about people in their 60s. They may be old as defined by law. But in today's modern world, we all live longer. Half of the world's people now live until they're 70. Just 50 years ago, that number was 57. While 200 years ago, half the population was dead by around 30 to 40 years. We're headed to 100, even 120, not too far into the future. I guess I was born too early.So, we can readily agree, being in your 70s is old. But the old I'm talking about is over 80, where I now exist. And where change is increasingly noticeable. The reality that we are, indeed, declining is before us all the time. I've no problem with it, I accept that I'll soon die. And, as an atheist, I accept there's nothing beyond this.The best thing about being old is that you know you're not dead. That is a definite plus. Someone actually better defined it as not old, but pre-dead. Rather cynical, indeed, but facing reality. I'm not being morbid, just realistic, facing the reality of life — and death.But my body is tiring, and my mind is not as sharp as it used to be. Fortunately, that brain comes from a high base, so I'm still more than competent to accomplish much of what I used to do.I have some health problems, but they are being managed. Hopefully, sufficiently well to give me a few more years. But I do visit hospitals more often than bars now. The latest visit being for another hip replacement.I don't climb ladders any more, two very serious falls and two fake hips dictate that. Walking is tiring, and taking care on uncertain surfaces where the loss of balance dictates taking extra care. Loss of balance infuriates me and is perhaps one of the worst features of old age. A cane or walker is wise in most circumstances.Having said all that, there are some real advantages to being pre-dead. You've climbed the proverbial ladder, maybe fallen once or twice, but you're at the top safely now. Secure, with your fears gone. The uncertainties of life have faded into the background. You're no longer uncertain of what lies ahead. Will I find someone to love? Will I get the job I want and progress upward? Will I have enough money? Will I find and keep friends? Will I be healthy and able to live a normal life? Will I have a hobby that absorbs me? Will I tick off the things I want to do on my bucket list?Questions, questions, questions. They've all been answered. The only question now is when and how? When do I go? I know it's single-digit years or months. But not how many. Most importantly, can it be quick and relatively painless? That's what we most desire. A long-drawn-out illness is the last thing we want. I have signed a Do Not Resuscitate form. If I'm with an incurable ailment and bedridden, supported by machines, pull the plug. I support assisted suicide. If you want to go, as long as you're of sound mind, you should have every right to go. On a wider scale, I firmly believe you should be allowed to do anything you want to — unless it affects others. Then you must consider the impact on them, too. For instance, what you do in your bedroom is your business, no one else's.When I go, I want my family and friends to celebrate, not mourn. I've asked Estee (my wife) to host a rock and roll ball. Dance at my funeral. Not sit — and I'm going to upset a lot of people here — in those dreadful, depressing mausoleums of misery and mourn.I've had a great life, done so many things, and had some modest involvement in making this a better country. I've been a race car driver (once only superfast reaction kept my head on my shoulders in an accident), sailed oceans in my own yacht (Japan to the Philippines was a true adventure). Being stranded in the middle of South China was an experience you'd rather not have. I've managed several large multinational companies, formed my own successful one, and traveled extensively. Lived life with a beautiful, happy family with two grown, successful kids. Having a companion through the vicissitudes of life is a great comfort. While having kids, apart from the great joy they bring, is essential in today's Metaverse world. Someone has to install that app for you. Negotiate the digital world for an analogic mind. I've enjoyed it all.I'm an engineer, and I spend much of my time pottering around in my superbly equipped workshop fixing things, building things and creating things. But nowadays, I find myself sometimes misdiagnosing what's wrong with something that needs repair that I never would have before. Although I generally correct it later.What is nice about being old is that you don't have to prove anything to anyone. If you want to do something you can just do it. Perhaps the one question is, should I retire, or not? That's entirely up to you, and the lifestyle you have. The principal determinant is to do just what you want to do.Now you can.I've always felt a little sorry for professional athletes. They reach the peak of their career too early in life. For us mere mortals, we ascend into the top echelon of our career toward the end of our lives. But for them, the end comes in their 30s. They are left with decades of life yet to live. It's a deflation.I reached the peak of my career in my early 80s. I realized I could no longer lead in the information business in a frighteningly rapid explosion into the IT world. So reluctantly, but realistically, I decided to close my 42-year-old company. And, except for contracts I'd long had with a couple of companies, I retired.Life is more leisurely, you are no longer driven to succeed. You already have — or haven't. It's too late now to change that. You're comfortable with who you are. That, with the loss of the uncertainties in life, are two of the greatest benefits of old age. There's no rush, you can take your time. The days go by more quickly now, so slow it down in how you live it. Spend more time relaxing with the family.wallace.likeitis@gmail.comTo be continued on Feb. 28, 2025
