AN internet meme listing eight things we should stop telling or asking people in gatherings during the holidays went viral. The list contains things that we tell or ask relatives, oftentimes without malice, but end up hurting and offending.
A relative would often ask a niece or nephew "Kailan ka ba mag-aasawa/magpapakasal?" (When are you getting married?), or "Ang tanda mo na. Bakit hindi ka pa nag-aasawa?" (You are not getting any younger. Why are you still single?), questions that offend both those who keep on trying but cannot find a suitable partner, and those who by choice and personal politics decide not to marry at all, or not marry someone from the opposite sex. A similar personal offense is taken when someone asks a married relative "Kailan mo ba balak magka-anak?" (When do you plan to have children?) simply because it is insensitive to those who may be unable to bear a child, or even those who choose not to have one.
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